2/21/2007

Please Call Dr. Mario!


All my glands are hurt and I'm bleeding!

Sigh!, I've been infected... My nose oozes clear Sinus Lava, my eyes feel like ripe Grapefruits, and I'm shivering like an old man waiting for the Grim Reaper. Wrath of the gods! How could such a mortal illness befall such a super guy! I blame the elderly and babies, alas they are too much of a foe for me to handle.

They say a person should use his or her weakness to make them stronger. You know like that ol' Daredevil fellow. He may be as blind as naked mole rats, but he could beat up your every day Street Hustla in a New York Minute.

But how can I, lowly Benhur Calaguas, use my Common Cold as a weapon of justice? Maybe I can sneeze on my adversaries or at least I can vomit on their dead parents' graves! But lets be honest, I don't think my new persona, The Savage Sick Man, will raise any eyebrows. I mean although my Fortress of Solitude would be my bed in the shape of a pillow fort, I don't think I'd have very many archenemies. Maybe this guy...


He is a Doctor!

Iron My Pants!

Okay, so folks last week I said we were going to talk about Iron Man and we will. But before I do so lets say some nice things about him!


Tony Starks, the man behind the suit, is rich! And as you know rich superheroes always get what they want: women, cars, boats, everything... this includes Orphans! Don't believe me just look a such hot Super celebs like Batman, Green Arrow, Scrooge McDuck (Who remembers that Duck Tales Episode?)! The fictional rich get what they want and if they want to fight crime, so be it!


Also, Ol' Ironsides is coming out with a movie! Now, don't base that off of his popularity, the forces that be did give us that awful Elektra and I didn't think she was that popular! But hey its Iron Man he's one of Marvel Comics's star players! He even hunted down the oh so elusive Stilt-Man during the 90s Armor Wars series!

And just to set the record straight, "I'm not teasing Iron Man because I've been brainwashed by the current Civil War series!"

The Truth

Like'em or love'em, Iron Man is what he is, a rich man with fancy gadgets! Kidding! Any way, the point of the matter is to show how Asians fit into the mix. Well it begins with a real war, the Cold War! Just like in the Golden Age of comic books where editors used World War II as a means of building fantastic plots and creating amazing characters, the developing Cold War was the perfect base to build elaborate story arcs.

And who'd be perfect to represent America's Fighting Force, but good ol' Arms Industrialist Tony Starks. However, even with his money, it won't stop him from taking that tragic trip to Asia!

We stop here folks, because I'm going to faint and perhaps cry myself to sleep. Which means I'm going to curl up, watch Princess Bride, and wish I could be the Dread Pirate Roberts!

Join us next week as we meet The Guru and Some Commie Bullies!

Greet me well or revel in my suffering by writing me a comment...

2/14/2007

Love is a Battlefield!

I love you
Happy Valentine's Day... you filthy animal!

Behold my villainous vassals the Death Day is upon us, Valentine's Day. Yes, Valentine's Day, the day when good school going children all around the world buy those ridiculous cards that make pansies out of the most manliest Superheroes...


I remember when I was a lad, my mom bought me a whole pack of Batman Valentine's Day cards. You know the kind that displayed the Cape Crusader in action poses with hearts all around him. And some of the cards would read...

I'll swing for you, my Valentine or Going Batty about you!

I was so overly excited to pass these around and I hoped that each of my classmates would say, "Man! Ben, these are the best Valentine's day Cards ever!" Instead, the same cards were also being passed around like old French Whores



But seriously folks! I don't think dipping the Dark Knight in rich chocolate will scare many of Gotham's shady underworld. Nor do I think the hearts surrounding him will protect him from gunshots, stabbings, or the occasional acid spray. At best, he could better his chances with the ladies! And if that's the case, then I'll start pouring candy hearts down my pants!

The Swingin' 60s

Alright enough Valentine's Day stuff, lets focus on the good stuff! Last time I spoke we were taking a look at the Silver Age of comic books. To recap, this period of time in Comic Book history primarily resides in the 1960s.

http://www.samcci.comics.org/nickfury/nfs04.jpgAt the time artists like, Jim Steranko, were applying new art styles to comic books. Some of the styles would include naturalism, Surrealism, and graphic designs.

In addition, the Silver Age opened new doors for legendary comic book creators Stan Lee, Jack Kirby, and Steve Ditko. These legends were responsible for the creation of such characters like The Fantastic Four, The Hulk, Spiderman, Thor, and other Marvel favorites.

And of course lets not forget...


Iron Man


I make a big deal out of ol' metal pants here, because his origin is riddled with the most ridiculous Asian stereotypes I've ever seen! But alas, we shall have to wait until next week...

Join us next week as I explain the origin of the Man in the Iron Suit!


If you like me you'll leave me a Valentine's Day comment!

2/06/2007

Back in the Saddle Again


We Got Him!

Where the hell have you been?

This question and this question alone, is probably the only question you have for me right now. And granted I feel like a estranged father that hasn't paid child support since Ricky Maritn was in Menudo. But ladies and gentlemen, I have returned and I'm back to tell you more about Asians and Asian Americans in comic books.

Just to let you know why I've been gone, well...

I got laid off


I'm okay and I don't need any more support. All I can really say is...

"Let those poor bastards who did this to me feel the Vengeance of the Ghost Rider"

or

"Well at I hope for those a'holes to get a bad rash!"


Any way... don't worry about me folks, I'm back working again and I don't have to resort to selling my kidneys to support my comic book habit!

Where Was I Last... Ah yes!

I was recently talking about the new Agents of Atlas, a Silver Age group lead by Asian American Jimmy Wong. And as you remember the Agents made an appearance in 2006 self entitled miniseries, which has recently ended. I'm betting you're wondering how I felt about the series?

Well, I liked it in the beginning... But the ending could have been better. Let me just show you this SPOILER panel.


Well if you read the series or if you just like twist surprises, let me just say...

"I like my plot twists like how I like whiskey sours, heavy on the whiskey and easy on the sour"

Any How!

Before I regale you with more history about Asians in comic books. Many of my few readers have been asking...

"Hey Benhur! How did you get so dorky?"

Well kids, it starts with the very thing that started my love for comic books... Marvel Comic Trading Cards!



Yes, yes... I spent many nights alone with my cards reading over and over again the back stories behind all of my favorite comic book characters.

I started collecting way before I started collecting actual comic books! I was really interested in the stories behind each characters and it intrigued me to see the stories would intertwine with other characters. Eventually, I wanted to know more and so I decided to collect the books so I could perpetuate my knowledge of all those fictional characters. Sometimes I feel like a secret agent looking at pile of dossiers, awaiting the moment where I can use my knowledge to save those I love. But until then, I'll just let you, the few who read my rants, the pleasure of sharing my somewhat vast knowledge.

Well, I'm too drunk to write any more and I have a feeling I'll be writing again very soon. I promise, by Thor's Hammer I promise, and that's a pretty tall order if you ask me! Well get ready for next week as we take one last look at the Silver Age and get ready to venture out to another major era in comic book history!



Hey kids! do you want to see me in person! Tell the good people at MAASU that you want to see me! And if they don't well, then I guess I'll have to unleash my full power... Shameless Begging!

Till Ragnarök my minions, leave me a comment!